Sunday, March 17, 2013

The blind date that opened my eyes...


December 19, 1976, I met Mark Searle on a blind date.  We went to a dinner dance with Bob and Brenda Bingham-Tracy .  Mark came to the door to get me and he didn't look the way I would have imagined.  I didn't visualize myself dating someone of Mark's size and especially his fashion sense!!!!  He talked to my mom while I finished getting dressed.  He told her about his cat Tuffy eating the bulbs on the Christmas tree.  I wore a yellow dress with a high collar and a cameo pin on the neckline.  It was the same dress I wore to the prom but my mom and I shortened it.  About two months ago, Mark was having a graft done on a heel ulcer on his foot.  He was afraid.  I was holding his hand during the procedure and I said "hey Mark, try to think of something else, like what was I wearing the first time you met me."  He was wincing in pain and fear, but became quiet for a few minutes.  And then he said "it was a yellow dress with a jewelry pin, and you looked beautiful."  The doctor said "WOW! how long ago was this?" And Mark said "it was in 1976, December and I will never forget that."  ...  The doctor, who was very young said "i have no idea what my wife wore the first time I met her, so I hope nobody ever asks me that question." ...  Mark Searle, I love that you never forgot anything... especially me! 

Back to the first date in 1976. Mark walks me out to the car and Bob and Brenda Bingham-Tracy were in the front seat. Now remember, this is a blind date and I have never seen or heard of Mark before this day. Mark and I are in the back seat. We make small talk. I ask Brenda if she picked up the tickets to the dance at school (it was prepay only) and she said something like "I thought you said you got the tickets yourself." Well, I didn't. I remember we were told specifically there would be no ticket sales at the door. So, I frantically discussed this scenario with everyone in the car on the way to the dance. I couldn't figure out what I was supposed to do with this guy I was with if Bob and Brenda got to go to the dance and I was stuck with this guy alone that I didn't know. We get into the restaurant and a couple of girls from school are sitting at a table collecting tickets. I walked up and blurted out this entire scenario about how I thought my friend got the tickets but there was a miscommunication and she didn't get the tickets and would they possibly have mercy on me and my date and let us in the door. As they were discussing this possibility, the man that was "my date" that evening, pulls two tickets out of his jacket pocket and bursts out laughing. I guess Bob, Brenda and Mark Searle were all in on this joke and it was at that moment that I decided I wasn't ever going to go out with him again. :-)

The first date: The sequel: After I sufficiently embarrassed myself enough standing in line and fretting over tickets that we didn't have, but actually Mark had in his possession all along, we proceeded to find a table. I remember thinking that Mark wasn't really all that funny even though he kept chucking over his little prank. We were served dinner and everyone got the same thing. Steak and potatoes and vegetable. Mark starts poking his fork at the steak and tells me that he isn't into eating animals that are still alive and somehow makes my meal seem quite unappetizing too. (I ate it anyway. I lived in a house with 9 people and steak wasn't something we ate, ever!!). So he says he doesn't dance. Brenda and Bob were dancing and Mark and I just sat there. It was weird and I was still upset over the ticket thing. Anyway, after the dinner "dance," Brenda and I had plans to spend the night at her house. The guys walked us to the door and Brenda's mom meets us there to see how our evening was. We all stood in the doorway and laughed and talked and then Mark does it... he says IN FRONT OF EVERYONE... "I had a wonderful time tonight and I would like to take you out again next weekend." AUGH!!!! Now how am I going to get out of this?? So I said ... yes... but I didn't want to!! He made plans to take me out the following Friday...

The second date;  He told me we were going to dinner and a movie.  I can't remember what I wore but I know I dressed casual because we were just going to the movies.  Mark came down the street in his own vehicle this time (the first date was in Bob's car).  That day he drove a black Dodge Challenger.  When he turned the corner onto my parent's street, you could hear him coming.  The music was blasting so loud that we could hear him 100 yards away.  He pulled up and got out of the car with a cowboy hat and still wearing the jewelry around his neck.  He had jeans and a tshirt of some sort.  He walked with his feet turned out like a duck.  (He told me he had a football injury to a tendon and when it healed, it forced his feet to turn out...so that made it less weird I guess).   The car leaked gasoline so bad that while it sat there in the driveway there was a puddle under the car.   When I got in his car, I was unimpressed to see the entire dashboard covered with a black and red shag carpet.  He proudly told me that he did that himself!  Really??  No kidding!!  Then he showed me how the glove compartment was just a tiny seam in the carpet and it was completely disguised.  He was quite proud of that fact.  He played music really loud in the car all the way to the Pizza Hut which is where we went for dinner.  And then played more music on the way to the movies to see Clint Eastwood in The Enforcer.  It wasn't exactly "chick flick" material, but the movie was actually quite intriguing and the pizza was good.  I thought he was odd.  He kept trying to put his arm around me during the movie but I leaned quite far in the opposite direction and tried to give him the clue that this wasn't really working out.  (He was oblivious).  When he walked me to the door after our 2nd date, I had practiced in my head how I was going to let him down easy.  He said "next weekend is my birthday.  Would you like to go out with me to celebrate it?"  ..... YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME... I thought.  So I said "sure, that sounds nice." ...   will the third date be the charm??  

January 5, 1977 – Mark picked me up in his noisy, shaggy, leaky vehicle and we went out to dinner.  I dressed up and so did he.  He wore another leisure suit (who knew someone would buy more than one of those things).  He somehow thought that opening the button of his shirt past his chest was attractive and he had the Justin Beiber hairstyle, only there weren’t a lot of girls swooning over that, for sure.  We went to a restaurant called “The Vineyard” and it was the first time I had ever been to an “all you can eat buffet.”  Remember, I was raised in a family with 9 people and one pound of pasta fed all of us with just a meatball and a small salad.  This place was massive.  I still, to this day, wonder if Mark noticed my mouth gaping open during the entire meal.  We visited and we chatted and he laughed a lot.  I was starting to notice that the guy spent a lot of time laughing.  He listened while I talked randomly about my plant that I named Gregory and my family.  I talked.  He listened.  I talked some more.  He listened some more.  So after dinner, it was freezing cold in his car because it had something wrong with the heater (nothing wrong with the radio), but the heater was broken!  He had a blanket in the car that he handed me and we drove around his section of town.  We drove by where he lived and where he went to high school.  He pulled into a dead end street and there was a circle at the end of it that he stopped the car and put it in park.  I thought “Oh Fabulous, I’m gonna need to use karate.”  (which I had no idea how to use, by the way.)  He looked over at me and said “when I met you that first night, I couldn’t believe that someone like me would be able to date someone like you.  I told my friends that I expected a “3” or a “4” and I got a “10.”  I love spending time with you and I would love it if you would wear my class ring.” 
I wish I could describe my thought process at this moment.  I was thinking something like “this can’t be happening; how can I tell him no way; and awww this is kinda sweet” all at the same time.  I reached out and placed it in the palm of my hand.  It WAS the palm of my hand; it was huge!!  My ring size was a 5 and his was an 11 or something like that.  I looked at him and said “I can’t take this ring, I don’t even know your last name.”
Well, if any of you have ever seen the video of Mark laughing, that was what he did.  He threw his head back in the car and started laughing from his toes all the way up to the top of his head.  He laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed.  I had no idea what was so funny because I was serious.  When he stopped laughing he said “this is why I love you already, because you are so funny.”  Then he said “it’s Searle S.E.A.R.L.E, Searle” all while he was still chuckling.   So I took the ring, because I didn’t know what else to do and put it on my finger.  He said “thank you so much, you have no idea how happy I am.”  I thought, “you have no idea how confused I am.”  And he drove me home.  Who knew that the ring on my finger was going to connect us for the next 36 years…

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